wow... this form can apply to any topic
well done on the form. I like the repeated words at the end of line 3/beginning of line 4 in the first 3 stanzas. One question: in stanzas III and IV, did you mean to use the word "chiasm" or did you want "chasm"?
I changed it to chasm for ease of read. Then no one would have to look it up. Both words actually fit I think? Do you think?
It is good that she now has an idea of her future, and I do hope that she attains her hope.
nice lines :)
The game of love is not always fair.. there are some that get it all.. leaving havoc in their wake... great use of the form.. the repetitions enhance it to get the message through.
an interesting write... the bastions...her hope of having both rocks of gibraltar, the being not there and all that goes with it... sometimes it takes a bit until we're able to cross those chasms..
Being with someone who is neither here nor there can be very disturbing.
I specially like the third stanza and that hopeful ending - Good work on the quatrain ~
Sorry! I am a Norwegian, not a profound reader of English, and I do not understand a bit of it.
def an interesting write...it took a little decyphering, but i think i followed the story...i thought for a bit you were chaining your lines with the end line beginning line repetitions, which was cool...and i have def crossed a few mental chasms...smiles.
Interesting diverse images build a solid poem of love/loss/ and puzzlement. Liked it.
I enjoyed reading your poem...the first line got me...she is not there....
Comments always welcomed.